Monday, December 31, 2007

New Years Eve: Get Your Boogie On

I haven't said much about it, but I'm rocking it here in the ATX, visiting my parents (unfortunately, this meant I missed some quality Wheezy time in Omaha). The last time we visited we didn't really see them, so this time Shorty and I have spent more time with them and taken it kinda easy.

But tonight is New Year's Eve, only one of the best party nights in over the 365 day year and Shorty and I are going to a party at one of our friends' places. The awesome part was my mom asking me if we were going to go to a party (I said yes) and she was like "OK, good. Your dad and I have been invited to a couple parties and wanted to make sure that you two weren't going to be bored at home." Thanks, mom.

Anyway in preparation for New Years Eve, here are some dance moves you can bust out tonight - it the Superbad sance intro performed masterfully by a couple of chicks.

This video is an exact reason why I love the Internets. Previously, this talent would have been wasted on a few friends, maybe a home video or a a talent show. Instead, now, it is getting burn on YouTube and FunnyOrDie as well as the all-important Skeet Thrower. They even have the video split-screened so you can see how well they performed it. Bonus: both of those videos are right at 1:05, so you can even watch them at work without feeling remotely guilty.

Also, while I'm on the subject of getting your groove on, here's a video of Will Ferrell giving us a little more cowbell with Queens of the Stone Age on SNL. This actually happened and I'm not sure how I've missed it (although I feel like I've seen this before). If you ever wanted to know what Will Ferrell would have looked like if he played the cowbell for more that 30 seconds, this is your chance.

I'm not sure how anyone on that stage held it together. Jimmy Falon couldn't in the damn skit...

Have a safe New Year's, everybody (and don't do be a derka by drinking and driving, honestly). I'll be traveling tomorrow so hopefully I'll be back by Wednesday or Thursday.

See you in 2K8.

Year In Recap: December

Its the last of the recaps from my posts of 2007. Just to let you know, I don't plan to recap my recaps - I'm not even going to link to them (you can get them from the side bar or search the recap tag, or click the recap tag). Anyway, I hope you've enjoyed reliving some of my posts/the awesome videos (that aren't mine) over the last few days. So, without further ado, here's the December recap.

In what was sort of a reminiscing post, I said I Wish I Would Have Tried This with respect to a couple of drunk crazy dudes jumping a Geo Tracker.

We saw a couple of dudes voluntarily taking shots to the nuts from a pitching machine while wearing One Nutty Buddy.

We saw an escalator attack a girl in a post entitled Some People Are Dumb. I guess I really could have gone a lot of directions in this post with a title like that.

I asked Why Is There Almost Always A Public Backlash? with respect to the potential Judd Apatow backlash. Ross gave an answer in the comments that might have been longer than the post itself.

On Christmas Eve, I tried to Make You Feel Good About Yourself by showing you the worst free throw form ever.

In the post Crazy Frustrating Video Games I showed you one of the craziest Mario mods ever.

And that's it. Most of my favorites from the past 12 months have now been recapped. I hope you learned something because I sure did - recaps are harder work than I thought. Until next year's recaps...

Sunday, December 30, 2007

Year In Recap: November

We're down to the final two recaps. With my new posting method in full effect, November took off with 18 posts a lot of videos and not a lot of writing. I felt like I really hit my stride in November, and I saw my hits and subscriptions double, which is a good thing.

In November, I apparently had an obsession with bad commercials. In the post Tiddy Bear and Some Skeet Throwing had a couple outrageous ones. Who makes something with the word "tiddy" that sits on your chest?

There was an Emergency BCS Top 5 Change (maybe removal was the better word) because Elisha Cuthbert went a little crazy with her hair. I have since been told that this is illegal; however, I'm still removing her, just not replacing her. I also included some awesome/ludicrous dance videos in that post.

I gave you an awesome story about A Real Life Dwight vs. Michael at my gym in one post, but my favorite thing in that post may have been the Cowbell Hero video.

Whether or not you like Mike Huckabee, I told you a video he was in About to be All Over the Internets because it featured Chuck Norris and was entitled HuckChuckFacts.

Anytime Will Ferrell makes a short video that makes me laugh, I'll write about it/post it. Green Team did that.

When a referee penalizes a football player for "Giving Him The Business" and its caught on tape, you can be pretty sure it'll get posted here.

I showed you some of the craziest/weirdest Japanese Fanta commercials and reminded you that I Love Japanese Stereotypes in one crazy post. This post was like the 6th time in the month of November that I used commercials...

There was more Japanese shananigans to be had in November. In the post I'm A Man... Engrish and poor translations but somehow tied that all together with a video about chicks peeing while standing up. I'm not sure why, but the Urinelle commercial (another commercial!) theme song popped in my head the other day.

I told you to Prepare to be Seduced by Snoop Dogg's new song, Sensual Seduction. This song is catchy - if you like funk, you will eventually like this song.

Until the final recap...

Saturday, December 29, 2007

Year In Recap: October

I hope two recaps a day isn't too much for you to read. Turns out you can just skip past them I guess...but that's no fun for me. Anyway, the October recap is up next.

I hit my 200th post in a post called Post #200: Its Been a Long Journey. Big thanks to my boy Wheezy for the new graphics again. I also changed my posting style to more videos, less talking at this point. I think its working really well despite the fact that I'm breaking that rule for these recaps.

Shipoopi was an awesome post that featured a couple ridiculous car insurance commercials. You know its good when I still get drunk texts that say "Shipoopi. Take that to the bank."

You may remember a song called Crank Dat (Superman Dat Ho). It wasn't overplayed or anything. Anyway, I took a look at the ridiculous Superman dance that swept the nation in the post called Superman, Crank Dat and the Houdini.

I don't mean to pick on R. Kelly, but he seems to come up a lot here (I'm not sure that that's a good thing). I took a look at another R. Kelly song/video/conversation in R. Kelly Breaks the 4th Wall.

I gave you another glimpse at It's Always Sunny In Philidelphia (no that's not a mistake, only the actual title is linked) with the Night Man song. If I'm ever down, I sing that song to myself. Sadly those videos aren't there anymore, but they were good damnit.

We looked at an awesome Internet education video and probably the best crowd shot of all-time in the a post entitled Let e Tell You Why My Life's a Trainwreck. Honestly, go back and watch that crowd shot and tell me if you don't laugh.

Until the November recap...

Willy, Il Principe Di Bel Air

I love Will Smith (although I'm boycotting his new movie because I hear he has to kill his own dog) but I'm not sure how he would translate into other languages. I have no clue, but apparently they translated The Fresh Prince of Bel Air into Italian. I have to imagine a lot of stuff was lost in translation (except for Carlton's dances) and it wouldn't be as funny, but you never know I guess. You be the judge.

That just doesn't sound like Will does it. Fortunately for Will, its not just The Fresh Prince that had issues translating to other languages. We've already seen the Japanese Spiderman, but have you've yet to see the 1964 Italian interpretation.

WTH? Seriously, why is Spiderman's belly sticking out of his shirt? This is the least fit superhero ever.

Year In Recap: Septiembre

Su hora para la recapitulación de septiembre. Había solamente 10 postes en septiembre así que será corta. Consecuentemente, estoy mecanografiando todo en español primero.

It's time for the September recap. There were only 10 posts in September, so it should be pretty quick.

Los videos más ridículos del mes estaban en un poste titulado ataque de los flotadores del desfile. Demuestra encajonado algunos de los años 80 peores que desfilan los X-Hombres los flotadores he visto siempre.

The most ridiculous videos of the month were in a post entitled Attack of the Parade Floats. It showcased some of the worst 1980's X-Men parade floats I have ever seen.

Probablemente di a Carlton Alfonso la prensa más positiva que lo reciben en un rato largo con un poste titulado ¿Adónde Carlton Alfonso Fue? Ese muchacho podría bailar.

I probably gave Carlton Alfonso the most positive press he's received in a long time with a post entitled Where Did Carlton Alfonso Go? That boy could dance.

En mi agolpamiento siempre cada vez mayor del hombre en Rainn Wilson (él apareció adentro como del 3 los postes de septiembre) le demostré un manojo de fútbol de Rainn/US (que no resultó como esperamos, el huh?) los anuncios en un poste llamaron a
Britney Dwight en un sujetador. Al parecer realmente amé utilizar la característica de la huelga también.

In my ever growing man crush on Rainn Wilson (he appeared in like 3 September posts) I showed you a bunch of Rainn/US Soccer (that didn't turn out like we expected, huh?) commercials in a post called Britney Dwight in a Bra. I apparently really loved to use the strike feature as well.

En el poste Qué Hizo este Verano? Recapitulé las películas del verano y le di algún hombre araña ridículo los videos. Éste no era probablemente uno de mis postes mejores, pero pensé que ató todo junto agradable.

In the post What Did I Do This Summer? I recapped the summer movies and gave you some ridiculous Spiderman videos. This was probably not one of my better posts, but I thought it tied everything together nicely.

Friday, December 28, 2007

Year In Recap: August

I got the blog back rolling again in August, cresting the double-digit marks on posts again. So, here comes the August recap.

I gave you a look at QVC: The Overlooked Channel and some of the crazy things that appear on it.

I complained about that Sean Kingston song "Suicidal" in the post No, You Make Me Suicidal. It also had the video of that crazy dude falling at the X Games and the picture above.

I let Avril back into my life in the post Avril, I Wish I Could Quit You. Nothing more to say here.

We took a long look at my boy I Am A Real (US) American. Our boy, Hulk has gone through some rough times lately - I can only hope he'll read this post and cheer up.

I ended my Summer Vacation when The Office said they ended theirs. We also had an awesome look into It's Always Sunny In Philadelphia, a show I now love.

Crazy Frustrating Video Games

Until high school, growing up all I had in my house was a classic NES. While this meant I got to play a lot of awesome games, it also meant I got to play some really, jank games. Some were just really hard and some games were just impossible to beat due to flaws in the programming (like you physically can't beat it). There was nothing more frustrating than playing a uber-hard/impossible to beat game and its probably good that I didn't swear when I was younger because I'm pretty sure I would have been grounded and lost the Nintendo.

Anyway, a friend of mine sent me a link to download the hardest NES game I never played (the first link on the page is where you can actually download the game). But he said that before I downloaded it, I should watch a video of the game play. Being that it was something crazy that I can't read, I decided to check it out. I've included the video below, so you can check it out too (its long, but its worth it). Turns out its a Super Mario Bros. mod and if you've ever played Super Mario before you'll immediately recognize it.

Basically everything you know is wrong. How can a 1-up mushroom kill you? Why does a bad guy come out of a box? Why is Mario some crazy cat thingy? How can you have negative lives? And having to commit suicide after beating the level...that's just mean.

I haven't downloaded the game yet because I don't know if I'm ready to swear at my computer yet, but sometime when I'm ready to torture myself I'll probably do it. Anyway, here's the second level...this thing can even kill you on the transition.

You can see the another two levels here and here. I have no clue how long this game is (it looks like it ends after the 4th level), but if I make it this far, I'll prolly be done anyway.

Year In Recap: July

I've finally reached the back half of the recaps. Turns out this is a lot more work than you'd imagine...and all I'm doing is looking at my old posts. Anyway, onto the July posts.

Even though I moved, the blog rolled on in New Job, New Digs, Same Blog. You also got a bad-ass Die Hard 4 music video (see more summer movie references).

R. Kelly gave us the behind the scenes look at Trapped in the Closet (and how some of his rhymes don't work) in Dresser Doesn't Rhyme With Baretta.

We looked at some really bad rap in Will I Get Sick If I Eat A Cholo. Really bad.

I gave you a story of how I ended up at a gay bar and asked Does TMNT Talk Work At A Gay Bar.

July was a short month. Until the August recap.

Thursday, December 27, 2007

Even The Smoothest People Have Rough Days

I used to listen to Casey Kasem do the Top 40 every Sunday when I was driving home from church (sadly he's been replaced by Ryan Seacrest). Casey has one of the smoothest voices I had ever heard, but I always wondered how he kept his cool reading through all of the BS he had to. Apparently he just has a good editing staff (careful on the language in this video).

To me, it is freaking hilarious to hear someone like Casey go off like that. I guess it just shows you that everyone has rough days, even people that I've never met but have smooth voices (I wonder what it would be like to hear Barry White recite that)...

Anyway, now that I've heard that, I wonder whether Casey had this kind of explosions at all of his voice-over gigs.

"And powdered too? Who's using powdered stuff? And how much shaving do you really need to do? Is that something you want to be telling f-ing everybody?...What is 'It does and it doesn't' even mean? Can we make a concerted effort to get a decent writing staff in here? F-."

Year In Recap: June

In the sixth installment of my recap, I'm going to cover June. This shouldn't be a surprise to you a June is the sixth month.

Remember in the May recap when I talked about the summer movie run (of course you do, it was yesterday)? Well, in the post Who's Knocked Up? we saw Michael Cera and capitalized on the upcoming movie Knocked Up (which was quite funny).

Remember that damn Buy You A Draaaaaaank song from this summer? In this post I made fun of it and found a video that did as well.

Remember this picture on the right? Its from the post Phil Is Phat Fat and a Small Recap. There's also an awesome San Antonio Spurs rap.

Remember when I was mad at Avril to the point that I wrote a post about Crossing Avril Out Of My Life? That didn't last long. I still love Sk8r Boi and Complicated is just all the more true.

Remember when I was Peacing Out at National Instruments? My last post in June was bittersweet as it signaled my last day of my first real jobby-job. And look what I'm missing out on.

Until the July recap.

Wednesday, December 26, 2007

Year In Recap: May

The frequency of these things is going to have to increase if I hope to get them done by the new year. Next on the list is May. On a side note, May started one of the best summer movie runs all-time. There are 10+ movies I enjoyed this summer. Anyway, here's the recap.

Capitalizing on the summer movie bash, I took a look at the crazy Japanese Spiderman in Spiderman or Supaidaaman. I'm pretty sure that some sort of Japanese mini-obsession started here.

We saw how Nickelodeon Slipped One Past Us by using the phrase "Skeet Face." I still laugh at that video.

I asked What the Hell Happened to Luke Wilson in the middle of May. The movie I referenced in that post, Blonde Ambition, rolled out this week and made a whopping $1300 in its opening weekend. I'm pretty sure know I could make a movie that does better than that.

In what has been probably my most popular post all time (not involving chicas), I broke down how to Ghost Ride Your Whip.

In a random post, I gave you an awesome white guy giving us an NBA freestyle and a Backstreet Boys stalker in Who Doesn't Want It That Way?.

In response to my BCS Top 5 Chicas, Shorty gave us her BCS Top 5 Dudes.

Near the end of May, for Memorial Day, we took a look at some National Anthem Disasters. My boy Todd is going to sing the National Anthem in January at a hockey game. I hope it goes better than these.

Tuesday, December 25, 2007

Merry Christmas...

...or however you choose to celebrate the birth of our Lord Jesus Christ.

I hope you enjoy your day. As another basketball related present to you, here are the Houston Rockets singing attempting to sing Jingle Bell Rock. Unfortunately its a little out of sync, but I still wanted to post it.

I really with that was in sync, although it looks pretty funny anyways.

In other news, you may also remember my Christmas post from last year, well, the entire Star Wars Christmas Special on YouTube again. Keeping with my Christmas tradition, here's a clip from that show (this time with ridiculous Wookie subtitles).

I think Princess Leia was giving Chewie a handskie...

Merry Christmas.

Year In Recap: April

Its Christmas and as a second gift to you, here is the April recap.

In one of my best recap videos ever, Week In Recap: It's A Shark Attack gave you an awesome shark attack video.

I relieved one of the scariest/funniest moments of my life in a post entitled Aruba Jamaica Ooh I Wanna Make Ya. It seems so long ago that I was teaching for NI...

The Association Starts Tomorrow was one of my favorite posts to write ever (I spent about 5 hours researching it) mainly because there are so many crappy NBA commercials. I never wrote the second part of that post. Maybe someday...

Another good recap post was entitled Shannon Elizabeth in which I showed a video of her deep throating a banana. My boy JP loved that one. That post also kicked off Testosterone Week on the Skeet Thrower, a concept that still gets me about 200 hits a day.

Testosterone Week culminated in me revealing my BCS Top 5 Chicas, easily my most popular post ever. I was informed by my wife that I was not allowed to remove Elisha Cuthbert from my list even though I would consider her cutting her hair a major event. At least I can change it up at the new year....

Monday, December 24, 2007

Christmas Eve: Make You Feel Good About Yourself

It's Christmas Eve here at the Skeet Thrower and I've still got time to post. Anyway, I hope you have a great holiday and fatten yourself up. I probably will.

Anyway, my gift to you this year is to help you feel good about yourself. No matter how long good you consider yourself at basketball, know that you probably shoot freethrows better than this guy.

And he's an NBA player. My favorite part of that video may be the crowd's reaction with Iverson's laughing coming in second. How do the refs not laugh at that? I have no clue. That shot is a train wreck.

Merry Christmas.

Friday, December 21, 2007

Casual Dress Friday: Scary Ass Violin Player

Its a Casual Dress Friday and today you're going to get a first-class seat on the thought train of the Double M here at the Skeet Thrower. So get ready for a journey.

Last night was my company's Christmas party and despite there being free booze I didn't even have any alcohol I only had one small glass of champagne. But I still had a great time. Part of that has to do with the fact that I like the people I work with, but the other reason is because one of the interns brought in Rock Band. This was my first experience with Rock Band, and I immediately jumped in on the drums. Which was awesome. I'm thoroughly disappointed this game isn't on the Wii.

Anyway, I began thinking what other instruments they could begin using for instruments and then I thought how preposterous it would be to have something like Orchestra Hero with things like flutes and violins. I wasn't convinced that violins could really play any music that I'd want in a video game; however, so I went to the Internets where I found this video.

I was blown away with the music, but I was distracted because that violin chick seemed very familiar to me. I watch a lot of NBA All-Star stuff but I didn't remember her from there. Then it came to. That's the freaky violin chick from Twista's Overnight Celebrity (I remember that video because it was on every morning when I was an intern at NI). Just watch the intro to this music video and you'll see what I'm talking about.

I do not want to be a part of any video game that involves that chick. No sir. That said, if the video game did contain this sweet classic music video, I'd be down.

Thursday, December 20, 2007

Computers Have Come A Long Way

When I'm not on the Internets, I'm generally at work making software (I don't talk shop much here, but stay with me...). Sometimes its kinda geeky, but it can be fun too. We just rolled out another beta release and during the updater testing, I noticed how much our product had changed since the last release and I was blown away. Then like 2 hours later I saw this commercial and thought it was fitting.

Let's be honest here, if you think I was posting just any CPU commercial you were way off. WANG computers? Honestly? The line "Big or small Wang" is said in that commercial. This company even had The Original Wang PC. No way that would fly now. Might as well have just called it Handskie, Inc.

Year In Recap: Best of March

Round three of the year in recap, and that means its time to take a look at the best of the 14 posts from the month of March.

I asked What the Hell Happened to Avril Lavigne (Part 2) and showed you her new video "Girlfriend." I also gave you an awesome Asian lip-syncing video. My favorite part of that post may have been a picture from the video that I used in another post and here on the left. I have no clue who that guy is, but I have probably single-handedly increased his internets exposure by 300%.

I revealed my BCS: Man Crush List publicly for the first time in March. Its amazing how this has changed since then.

I gave you an in-depth look at ninjas and the show Ninja Warrior in early March.

When NCAA tournament time rolled around, I told you that It's Not Like I Get Anything Done Anyway because all I do is watch the tourney. I also gave you some advice by way of ridiculous videos with who not to pick in your pools.

With Shandi Finnessey making an appearance on Dancing With The Stars, I renewed my campaign to get Chuck Woolery to take over the PIR in a post entitled Woolery, Shandi and DWTS. I still think Woolery would be a better host than Drew Carey.

I unveiled my BCS: Bottom Five near the end of March. I still strongly dislike/hate most of those people, although I can already guarantee you that list will change when I make it again next March (although Sandra Oh will probably still be number, I hate her).

Until the April recap...

Wednesday, December 19, 2007

Jingle Bells Remix

I was gonna save this for later, but I want to get it out before its everywhere. Here is a remix featuring Rasheed Wallace, Jason Maxiel and a couple scrubs from the Detriot Pistons singing Jingle Bells. For some reason the beginning part makes me laugh hard.

Big People, Little People Everybody...

Year In Recap: Best of February

In keeping with my (new) tradition, I'm recaping the best of each month over the last year here on the Skeet Thrower. I started with January (as you can imagine), so now I'm moving onto February.

I found an awesome clip for the post: Name This Country: ASIA! Nothing like making fun of stereotypes...I never do that.

I hit my 100th post in February and gave you a post ingeniously titled Its The 100th Post Extravaganza. I think Wheezy is coming up on his 100th post himself, so keep a look out for that one.

Throughout my time here at the Skeet Thrower I love to bring up some of the favorite things from my childhood. In the post Master of Turtles and a Ninja Rap I found out that some of my friends consider me a master of the Turtles. I also gave you a throwback video from Vanilla Ice.

I gave you some awesome Rainn Wilson videos (and a topical reference at the time) in the post I'm About To Make It Rainn!

I know this isn't on this blog, but someone also wrote a post about me in February. I'm now on top of her all the time - and by that I mean I'm her boss (wait...someone put me in charge of someone else? More on that some other time). What were you thinking.

Until the March recap...

Tuesday, December 18, 2007

Why Is There Almost Always A Public Backlash?

Can someone explain to me why there is almost always a public backlash against something that is really popular? You know what I'm talking about - People start complaining about something, saying things like "Its not as good as it was" or "I never really liked it anyway." Its already starting with The Office (unjustifiably) in (the sadly abbreviated) season 4 and has happened over the last few seasons of 24 (perhaps justifiably) - people are starting to turn on it. Unfortunately, if enough people start murmuring, executives could talk about changing or canceling the show. The worst part about this is that the show/movie/music probably never needed changed, people just needed something to complain about.

I myself am guilty of this - I bitch about the quality of SNL (justifiably) and Tara Reid (unjustifiably), talking about how much better they used to be. To be honest, Tara Reid was just never that good (she always had that smoker/hooker voice/hair) and I should have never been that high on her to begin with. SNL, well, that's just another story.

Anyway, Will Ferrell has had a slight backlash building against him since Ricky Bobby (I guess some people didn't even like bastards) and Judd Apatow had people threatening to backlash against him this summer with 2 movies coming out. Fortunately for him and us, the movies were awesome and did really well. Even if you didn't like one of the movies, you probably like the other, and they were generally well received. Well, now Apatow has another movie coming out that you've definitely seen the previews for, Walk Hard and people are already lining up to say its gonna be a flop. We'll see. Either way, Judd is poking at his critics in this funny viral marketing video featuring a bunch of his people that have been actors in his films.

You can catch this video on Funny or Die as well. Anyway, I hope Daryl from The Office (whatever his name is) starts to get a bigger role in these movies. He always makes me laugh.

Year In Recap: Best Of January

I'm stealing an idea from one of my favorite websites, Deadspin, and leading up to the new year I'm going to be recapping some of my favorite posts on a month-by-month basis (if I was better my weekly recaps this would be even easier). Anyway, since January comes first, here's the January Recap:

The first post of the year was a video shown to me by my little bro and one that a bunch of people probably missed. Its a video from some guy named Zlad who severely butchers the English in his song. The post was called Hey Baby Wake Up From Your Asleep and that's an actual line he uses in the video. If you watch one video in this recap, make it this one.

The NFL playoffs are almost here and my adopted team for last year's playoffs were the San Diego Super Chargers and in this post I found gave you their theme song. I forgot all about this song and I'm not going to put it on my Ipod and blare it out over my speakers at work.

I sang the Tom Brady ballad from the post entitled Uuuhhhggg-rrr! Means Tom Brady as I've had him on 2 of my fantasy teams (even though he cost me this week). There was also an awesome American Idol video where a chick sings like a lion that is no longer available there...but it is available here (and you should really watch it again).

The Office: Pam Vs. Karen sparked a nearly year-long debate (and one of the funniest episodes of The Office) and also had my favorite picture of the month and probably of the year. As a result, I've placed it on the right so you don't even have to click on the link (if you do; however, you'll get to see an awesome Diddy video).

The last post of January was probably my favorite and I used something called JumpCut to cut and add the video to the Internets myself (which lead to some random chick putting a <3 in my comments and I had no clue what that meant until then - its a heart) - its a dubbed over battle from the Power Rangers which made me laugh a lot entitled They Call Me A Mastadon Cuz I Got The Trunk In The Front.

Until the February recap...

Monday, December 17, 2007

College Football Withdrawl...

When Nebraska's college football season fell apart, I didn't want to watch much more football for the time being. But eventually my distaste wears off (unlike my distaste with Wii Golf, but that's another story) and I want to watch more. Now I'm kinda in withdrawl as there's no real college football on right now. Anyway, here's an awesome comment that I wish I would have seen a few months ago only because I would have posted it earlier.

He doesn't even follow it up with "Not that there's anything wrong with that!" What is he thinking. There's all that dead airspace there...
Why didn't he say anything? Holy nuts.

Hope you had a good weekend. Get ready for a posting extravaganza this week.

Friday, December 14, 2007

Casual Dress Friday: Some People Are Idiots

Do you remember the first time you saw an escalator? I had to be like 3 and just amazed. But my mom said not to play on it because it could easily chop your fingers off. This, of course, made me more intrigued by them and I used to try and run up them backwards and do all kinds of stupid things. But I always knew my limits so I didn't fall down and get sucked underneath it like some crazy department-store death wheel that would spin me around and around. Apparently this girl does not know her limits.

Well done, chica. How awesome would it have been if it carried her like 5 feet higher and then she has to figure out how to get back down the escalator? I have always wanted an escalator in my house, but now I want one even more. Why? Because I would try to dupe people into that kind of situation.

Have a good weekend.

* If you click on the video and goto the YouTube page, I'm not sure why the video was titled that. I found this video and was looking for a shorter version and stumbled on that. Honestly.

Thursday, December 13, 2007

Underoo Transformation

I used to have Underoos (not to be confused with Dunkaroos but I never had this happen to me.

Now I'm disappointed. I think I'm gonna try to buy some Underoos somewhere...

Tuesday, December 11, 2007

One Nutty Buddy

As a dude, there are several things you learn growing up. One of them is getting tagged in the nuts is not a lot of fun. I remember the first time I got hit, playing t-ball when I was 5. I was playing 3rd base, took a line-drive right off of the tee. I immediately buckled over, feeling the worst pain of my short-lived life. Ever the competitor, I grabbed the ball, crawled to 3rd base, and got the force-out from the unmercifully slow kid on 2nd base. Then I went and sat on my mom's lap. Knowing that, why would anyone ever wear the pants shown on the left? It doesn't make any sense. Do they expose your nuts? No. But why would want your cod piece hanging out of your pants. What happens if you get a random boner? What then? I guess the only reason you would weat these would be for an easy-access handskie.

...back to baseball. After t-ball, we moved up to machine pitch and they required you to wear a cup. My coach always threatened to do a cup check (by tapping you with a bat, what are you thinking?), but I never saw him do it. Back then, we just bought plastic cups - we didn't have these crazy cups. This guy, a former MLB player I guess, takes a pitching machine to the nuts from relatively close range. There's a little bit of setup, but its kinda nuts and makes you really nervous if you're a guy.

I don't care who you are - that guys an idiot. Although maybe not as dumb as this guy. If you want to see a few more pitching machine tests, there are a bunch of them in this video.

I don't know why watching a guy get hit by pitching repeatedly not in the cup is funny, but that made me laugh.

(HT: D&T)

Monday, December 10, 2007

You Know What I Don't Have Enough Off Anymore?

Ninjas. I haven't written about them in a while. I was gonna write a long post, but instead I went to bed. In any case, here's a ridiculous trailer for a movie called "Machine Girl." I have no clue if this is real but its awesome either way.

Thursday, December 06, 2007

I Wish I Would Have Tried This

I used to own a Geo Tracker, quite simply one of the most ridiculous cars a person could own. It looked very similar to the picture on the right, except it had bigger tires, a steel I-beam for a bumper and a running bar (it was a farm vehicle I purchased second hand). To help you understand the quality of the Tracker: I was able to buy a book that explained how to take apart and reassemble every part of the Tracker, including the engine block.

Anyway, we had a lot of good times in the Tracker jumping curbs/medians, off-roading in a vehicle "built for off-roading (but will probably result in this if you get a little too crazy)" and trying to tip the car over from the inside (we were dumb, but you could seriously get it on two wheels if everyone threw their weight to one side or the other). But there's one thing I wish I would have tried before I let the Tracker go (exercise caution on the don't need sound anyway):

Those guys had to be tanked - no one would try that sane/sober.

I don't know where the Tracker is today (I sold it to some kid after the clutch went out. Don't worry, the Karma gods smiled on me: it was a rebuilding project for him and his dad), but I hope whoever has it, they are enjoying it as much as I did.

Wednesday, December 05, 2007

Did You Know Hanukkah Started Yesterday?

Well, thanks to the lack of new TV, I have no new TV on my DVR so I just watched a Jay Leno episode from what had to be the early 90's. No leather couches (just uncomfortable looking chairs), David Copperfield as a guest (and bragging about banging Cindy Crawford) and Leno with hair worse than this. Anyway, you learn some interesting things when there's no TV on. For instance, I just learned that Hanukkah started yesterday. All I really knew about Hanukkah came from Adam Sandler and 8 Crazy not much. I've been saving a video just for this occasion, so here's a video of some NBA stars demonstrating their knowledge of Hanukkah.

That's right, keep 'em torched.

Tuesday, December 04, 2007

Tim Meadows Walks Hard

By now, you should know me, and, so, you should know I love movies. Especially ones that feature Will Ferrell or are directed by Judd Apatow. That's why I'll be on my way to the store today to pick up the unrated version of Superbad on DVD.

Anyway, I'm sure you have seen the preview for Walk Hard: The Dewey Cox Story which comes out in 2 weeks. In case you haven't, here's an extended trailer (that you prolly haven't seen anyway).

I'll probably see it just because there's a Team Pam, Paul Rudd and inevitable Will Ferrell cameo. Altogether, I'm not sure how good this movie will be, but, if nothing else there's a cameo from the woefully underused Tim Meadows.

Not that funny you say? Well just watch this clip of Tim Meadows as the Ladies Man and tell me that you aren't excited for his cameo.

Psyche. (Does anyone even say that anymore? I just say things like Noonan or Steve Perry while others, like my brother-in-law, go for things like Terry Schaivo or Michael Vick...nobody's perfect I guess). Anyway, here's a real clip of Tim Meadows.

Friday, November 30, 2007

Casual Dress Friday: Prepare to Be Seduced

Its a Casual Dress Friday here at the Skeet Thrower and its been a while since I've brought you a classic music video. So here today is Snoop Dogg's "Sensual Seduction."

Did I say classic? I meant that's brand new. That Snoop video just is just like Michael Jackson's video "Don't Stop 'Til You Get Enough" only it was filmed with a $100 budget by some high school AV Team. I could have filmed produced a better video with my digital camcorder and Windows Movie Maker. At least the song's catchy (unlike some other atrocious pop music over the last year or so). Honestly, though, there are some very similar things in that Snoop video and the MJ video I was talking about. Look for yourself.

Give Michael some girls and you've got the same video. On a side note, it's too bad they don't include the "Mama-say, Mama-saw, Mama-ma-ku-sa" ad lib in the video.

Have a good weekend.

Thursday, November 29, 2007

I Love Misheard Lyrics Videos

I don't know if I ever posted this, but do you remember that Fall Out Boy video with the misheard lyrics? Well, in case you don't here it is:

I love that video enough that this year I named one of my fantasy football teams "Also Into Cats." Anyway, people have been trying to duplicate that video for quite a while (often with poor to very poor results), but I finally found another one that made me laugh pretty hard. Here is Sean Paul's Temperature.

Wednesday, November 28, 2007

I'm a Man...

...and I pee standing up (you thought I was gonna go with the I'm Forty line there, didn't you? Well, I gotcha then). What does this have to do with anything? Well, I'll get you there, but, first, answer this question: Have you ever laughed at Engrish? If you laughed at the picture on the left (either previously, just now or both), then you have enjoyed Engrish, which is basically incoherent English from our friends in Japan (two references to Japan in two days!). Apparently direct translations to English from Asian languages don't work out and, often, result in hilarious outcomes. For instance, take this picture from Arrested Development where the Chinese subtitles where translated directly to English.

The actual line spoken there? "What is wrong with you?" That's awesomeness. What does all this have to do with standing up while you relieve yourself? I'm getting there. Anyway, beyond Engrish, Japan is known for churning out some pretty sweet video game stuff. Of course, porting games directly from Japanese to English can have some pretty hilarious results as well. If you've played games before, you are probably familiar with the phrase "All Your Base Are Belong To Us."

That's an actual video game (sadly, the voices were added for the video). Still failing to see the connection to #1 here? Well, let me introduce a product called Urinelle to you. I won't tell you what the product does (but if you can't figure it out based on what I've been talking about this entire post, then you're struggling at life), I'll just let this video do the talking. Oh, and while you're watching this, listen to the chorus.

That's right, the chorus of that advertisement is "All your base are belong to us, all you base belong to us, now." I'm not sure what that means. On a side note, I once had a chick come into the dudes bathroom and pee next to me at San Antonio's version of Mardi Gras (SFW). She was way hot, but definitely didn't have one of these and ended up peeing all over herself which was embarrassing for everyone there. In any case, I'm not sure that I would recommend these things for anyone, but hey, I'm a man, and I pee standing up.

See I tied it all together for you. Besides, where else will you get to see a chick pee while standing and a video about a video game all in one day.

Tuesday, November 27, 2007

I Love Japanese Stereotypes

I have written about ridiculous Asian stereotypes before. They always make me laugh. Always (in fact, the video from that link made me laugh, hard, again). The crazy Japanese are the ones that always perpetuate these crazy stereotypes with their shows and commercials. But these Fanta commercials may take the cake.

And I thought American Fanta commercials were crazy... Here's another Japanese commercial with no stereotypes just for good measure.

Monday, November 26, 2007

Giving Him The Business

I don't know if you saw this but this is possibly the best penalty call ever. It happens about 42 seconds in. It is awesome.

Ah yes. He must have learned from this ref (it happens at about 1:17).

Thank God for YouTube (and The Big Lead).

Friday, November 23, 2007

Day After Thanksgiving...

...Means its time for Nebraska versus Colorado. I was two years ago today (well, not today exactly, but two years ago on the day after Thanksgiving), that a few of my friends and I jumped in the car at like 5am and drove to Colorado, expecting us to get our asses handed to us. Instead, we saw what was one of the most fun Nebraska football games I have ever attended.

My favorite moment was going back and watching the DVR'd version of the game to see this interview.

It's a total insult to go no huddle. Why would anyone try to score right before the half? I have no clue. That's just insulting.

Let's hope it turns out like this again.

Wednesday, November 21, 2007

Green Team!

If you haven't seen this yet, watch it now. Do it. Do it now!

It's snowing on me here in Nebraska. If we could go ahead and get this global warming thing sped up a few years I'd be cool with that.

Tuesday, November 20, 2007

How Does The News Get So Messed Up?

I'm not talking about the news itself - I'm talking about the newscasters. I've shown you some clips before, but it blows my mind - things like this picture on the left or the video below can happen. These people are supposed to be professionals but stuff like this happens all the time. I see it at least once a week on TV - it even happened yesterday on Good Morning America (my wife watches it). Anyway, I'm not saying I don't like it, I'm just blown away that it can happen. Lord knows I've watched this video like 100 times...

How does that happen? How! That blows my mind. Let's be honest though - anytime there's the mention of "gay" in the news, its an excuse to post this video.

Monday, November 19, 2007

This Video Is About TO Be All Over The Internets...

I had even shared it, but I couldn't resist posting it. That is all.

Friday, November 16, 2007

Casual Dress Friday: Real Life Dwight vs. Michael

Its a Casual Dress Friday and it has been a very busy week for me. Not only have do I have a bunch of new video games in my possesion: The Simpsons, Contra 4, some Lego game where you can actually be Admiral Ackbar, Ultimate Mortal Kombat and Guitar Hero 3 - speaking of which, if you haven't seen this clip of Cowbell Hero its a must watch.

Sorry, I got distracted, where was I - oh yes, busy - at work we're also within 5 days of a code freeze and I've also been working out every day. Working out is pretty low key. I go, run a few miles, lift a little bit and peace out. I try not to pay attention to anyone else, but the other day I couldn't help it (Long Story Warning: If you have ADD or you just don't want to read this...just skip ahead to the ***).

There were two guys lifting together (I have no clue who they are or what their names are), one in his upper 30's, for the sake of this story, we'll call him Marvin, and one in his upper 20's, we'll call him Derek. Marvin was clearly Derek's mentor and seemed to be more experienced at lifting, so, Marvin was showing his workout routine to Derek. While he was explaining everything, Marvin would tell Derek the number of reps on each machine that he would do (he never did more than one set). Of course, the entire time, Marvin was saying how hard it was and how exhausted Derek would get.

Tired of talking, Marvin goes into an extensive stretching machine to warm up his muscles for the lifting. At this point, I have slowed down my lifting just so I can watch this. Do you ever get the feeling that a train wreck is about to happen so you just pretty much stop whatever you're doing to watch it and you keep trying not to look but you can't help it because you know its coming? This was one of those times.

Finally, after what seemed like 20 minutes, Marvin jumped on a leg machine...unfortunately I was in the middle of a set. I couldn't see what weight he started at, but I could hear him him grunting and struggling to get it up (that's what she said). I quickly pounded out the rest of my reps and took a look at what Marvin was lifting. It was 40 pounds. 40. Just to give you a point of reference, Shorty does around 125 L-Bs on that machine.

Now let's not get it twisted - I don't laugh at what people lift - I can't bench much more than my own weight, but this was bad. The funny part; however, occurred after Marvin traded positions with Derek. Derek wants to increase the weight, but Marvin tells him that it gets really hard around 5 or 6 so he shouldn't. So, Derek jumps on and pounds out 12 reps in like 20 seconds. Right when Derek finishes, Marvin says "Wasn't that f---ing hard?" and Derek says "No. I didn't even feel like it worked me out." Awesome. You could tell that Marvin was pissed but determined to show that his workout would wear Derek out.

Marvin and Derek move through about 3 more machines until Derek looks at Marvin and says (this is an exact quote) "You are weak. I apparently have the strength of you plus me." This, not surprisingly, pissed of Marvin, so on the next machine (which happened to be right next to mine), he tries to throw up 200 pounds. Of course, he immediately hurt himself and Derek had to help him out of the weight room.

I don't know why this was so funny, and describing it probably doesn't do it justice, but it just seemed like a real life version of Michael and Dwight from The Office. The previous story is 100% true.

***If you want to skip the long story, just start reading here.***The best part of it all? The old guy (Marvin) was wearing Reebok Pumps.

Have a good weekend.

Wednesday, November 14, 2007

Emergency: BCS Top 5 Change

You may or may not remember, but once upon a time I listed out the rules for my BCS Top 5. In the rules I said an emergency situation needed to occur to change the list. Well, an emergency situation has arisen and you can see it on the left here - Elisha Cuthbert has chopped her hair. A lot. And for some reason, that just doesn't do it for me (apparently she doesn't even like it). Not even the scenes from The Girl Next Door (NSFW) can help her out. So, I'm removing her from the Top 5. But rather than replace her, I will leave the place void until I set a new list. That, my friends, caused my reaction yesterday.

To take your mind off of this inexplicable tragedy, here are some clips from the unexplainable show, Yo Gabba Gabba. The first one features an actor I strongly dislike, Elijah Wood.

Do the Puppet Master! Here's one featuring rapper Biz Markie.

If you made it to the end of that clip, you may have noticed begun to notice the dancing theme with these clips. I have no clue what that's all about, but here's one that The Soup picked up.

And by now you've forgotten all about Elisha's brutal hair change and learned some new moves along the way. I can't wait to try out The Puppet Master.

Tuesday, November 13, 2007

I'm Not Dead

Although this happened to me last night.

Well, not that exactly, but I did tap out early. More on that later...

Friday, November 09, 2007

Casual Dress Friday: Top 10: The Office

It's a Casual Dress Friday and I am really sad that we could be losing The Office way earlier than we need to. So, here are two Top 10 videos from The Office that always make me laugh. They are kinda long, so I'll be short on the text.

The first is the Top 10 That's What She Said moments.

The second are the Top 10 songs sung on the show.

Thursday, November 08, 2007

Tiddy Bear and Some Skeet Throwing

I have written a lot about commercials/infomercials. I'm not sure why. It's probably because there are so many of the damn things that there's bound to be some really funny/ridiculous ones. That said, this one may top them all. I'm not even going to tell you why...just watch it.

How did that name get through? The Tiddy Bear? Honestly? I'm flabbergasted. I think that may have blown away the BCS #1 for Most Ridiculous Commercial/Product combo:

That's just ludicrous, although it does adequately demonstrate the title of the blog. It's not hard to see why it was number 1. That said, it gets even better with a remix.

Ah skeet, skeet.

Wednesday, November 07, 2007

Writers' Strike: The View Must Go On

I hate the Writer's Strike. It sucks. Unfortunately, I agree with the writers - why shouldn't they get a portion of the ad revenue online and DVD sales. Seems to make sense. Of course, they're prolly losing a lot more money by not working then they all will each individually make on the eventual residuals they earn. But its the principal.

The worst part is that its starting to effect my television. No more late night shows and it sounds like some of my favorite shows are only going to be around for a few more weeks...maybe (I won't go into detail because Vasquez did a decent job here although if you want more info about The Office, you can check here).

I guess one of the benefits of the writer's strike is that Grey's Anatomy and Private Practice could be going off the air. Unfortunately, they could be replacing it with this show.

Gotcha! That's just a clip from The Soup, but since I hadn't shown a clip from that show in a long time, I figured I'd get one up here. Sadly, I can only assume that show is going off the air due to the writer's strike as well. I guess we can all rejoice that The View is going to go on uninterrupted. Here's a preview of what's to come.

I can only assume the writers for The View went on strike a long time ago.

Monday, November 05, 2007

Robert Goulet: American Gangster

So, this weekend I saw American Gangster with Denzel Washington as Frank Lucas, a heroin kingpin of Harlem. It was good and I recommend seeing it (it is 157 minutes - thats 2 hours and 37 minutes - so its kinda long, but worth it). I won't say much about the movie other than that, because its a drama and I don't want to spoil anything. As far as the cast goes, beyond Denzel and Russel Crowe, I was interested to see the 3rd-tier supporting cast for this movie. That's right the 3rd-tier guys, not the main people or their supporting actors (whom I would consider 2nd-tier), but the rest of the cast.

Why was I interested in the rest of the cast? Because, Jay-Z was producing the music for the movie and I figured he and his crew/posse/boys would have a cameo/minor part as a result of this fact (and more than likely, mess it up). Turns out that the movie features hip-hop artists Common, RZA and T.I. who all perform very well in their smaller roles. No Jay-Z, and, strangely, no new Jay-Z songs (there was one older song). Turns out the director's wanted to go with a 70's feel for the music, and so Jay-Z is instead releasing a concept CD "inspired" by the movie (the last time I heard a CD called a concept album, it was Dr. Dre promoting something called Detox. which has only been delayed like 5-6 years...but that's another post - I digress). I really know nothing about Jay-Z's new album. I hope its better than his last one - because that one sucked. Fortunately for us, Jay-Z has done a lot of things that don't suck, like this skit with Will Ferrell.

That's right, a second Robert Goulet SNL Skit, this time with profanity (that's really old but for some reason I had never seen that one...or just don't remember it)! Goulet really appears to have that gangsta thing down. Why wasn't he in American Gangster, you ask? Well, you may or may not know, but Goulet passed away last week (RIP). And even though they film the movie months in advance, they removed the scenes he was in the movie because they felt it was poor taste. Everything in the last sentence is also false - he simply was not in the movie. In any case, most people in 18-30 range (so, pretty much everyone that reads this blog...all 8 of us) best know Goulet from those skits or perhaps this Emerald Nuts commercial from the SuperBowl.

I think that was my favorite commercial from the Super Bowl. Well done, Goulet. Well done, indeed.

Saturday, November 03, 2007

76 - 39

Last year, some of my friends made a group called the Harrison Beck Fan Club after Harrison transferred out of Nebraska. We created it to make fun of Zac Taylor who we teased about Nebraska's 40-15 loss at Kansas his first year in the program. I wouldn't recommend reading through the comments (although the times where outsiders didn't know it was a joke are really, really funny), but, mainly, people just didn't get how we could think Zac wasn't right for Nebraska (although, ironically, he's a member of the group) - they had all seen our program without Zac the year before when we got beat 70-10 because our Quarterbacks sucked. Fast-forward two years, we're without Zac and now we get pummeled 39-76 at Kansas. Most points we've ever given up. Joey Ganz had a nice day (400+ yards, 4 TD's = 32+ points in my fantasy leagues I forgot he also ran for a TD, so that's 5 TD's for 40+ points, but the 4 INTs = -8 as well...), but there's not much could do to stop Kansas's offense. Harrison Beck probably could have...

What's my point - I have no clue. I guess there's two things: 1) At least we're not Notre Dame (although, truly, what's the difference at this point?) and 2) At least my friend Nomar has got some good ammo to heckle fellow Nebraska fans with. You would be surprised how upset people get when you remind them of 70-10 or 40-15 or 5-6.

Anyway, to [Insert reason can choose from: to distract you or make you laugh, or stop being bored because you don't really care about Nebraska football or football in general, or just to include a video in this post] here's the new Spice Girls music video. Say what you want about them (I was never really a fan - let's be honest I could write a whole post about them), but don't act like you didn't know the words to the chorus of Wannabe.

*Gratutious picture of Erin Andrews eating a sandwich to remind you that everyone needs to eat...except Mangino who really, really needs to mix in a salad.

Friday, November 02, 2007

Casual Dress Friday: Balky's Got Magic

Well, its a Casual Dress Friday here at the Skeet Thrower and after last week, I decided that I would not be making the (however long the drive is) trip to Lawrence, KS this weekend. Mainly because I didn't want to see this guy light us up. Then I found out that he's not even their starting quarterback. And I still decided not to go. Turns out I don't want to go watch a team I don't respect beat us. Why can't I respect an 8-0 team? Because this is an actual picture they ran on their website after they started 4-0.

Seriously, my computer is honestly humming extra loud since I loaded the picture of that fatty. Anyway, the plust side to not going to Lawrence is that I get to have a relaxing weekend: catch up on TV, watch some football and watch some videos on the Internets. Honestly, I've just been starring stuff in my reader...I'll finally have a chance to catch up on some stuff.

Now, enough boring chat - here's a video:

That video is random, yet awesome. How come The Fridge gets his own GI Joe? I have no clue. You may think this video is out-of-nowhere, but its topical considering the item I shared in my shared feed. What's a shared feed? Basically, its stuff that I find pretty funny but that I don't write about here. You can basically let me filter out even more of the Internet for you. You can either check over on the left sidebar every time you come to the site or you can just use this link to get the feed directly to a reader of your own.

But I digress...the whole point of today's post was supposed to be about the old-school TGIF lineup with shows like Family Matters and Step-By-Step. At the peak, I remember a show called Perfect Strangers was a closer (did you know that Family Matters was a spin-off from Perfect Strangers - Harriett Winslow was the elevator woman in the Perfect Strangers' guys' building). So, what better way to close today's post than a ridiculous video from a Perfect Strangers Halloween episode.

Tuesday, October 30, 2007

The Klein Four Are (2^3 -1) Years 2 Late

I've said it before - I read a lot of things on the Internet. Generally, when something rolls through my reader 3 or more times, I make sure to check it out. So, yesterday, this video rolled through a bunch. It's from a group called The Klein Four (although there are five of them based off some crazy math...I stopped before that stuff in college).

Let's take a look at a couple things in that video: 1) Either those guys are not wearing backs to their pants or it is really easy to make the girl on the steps laugh. Honestly, she cracks up multiple times. 2) Why does the guy "beatboxing" feel the need to match every sound with and air cymbal?

Well done to those guys, though. They came up with an excessively long a cappella song about math. But doesn't it seem a little bit familiar? An all boy band using math lyrics...I think I've seen this before.

You may have forgotten (or never seen, I guess) 2gether, another fake boy band that used excessive (although more understandable) math lyrics in their songs around 7 years ago. Way to rip them off guys. If this wasn't a fake band...well, I'm not sure that anyone would really care. You guys admit you're just a joke anyway. In any case, if you looked closely at that 2gether (or 2ge+her) video, you might have noticed a Farley brother in there (sadly, not Chris). It's the lesser known Kevin Farley who you may or may not remember from such things as this Hertz commercial, or if you have the HBO, this clip from Curb Your Enthusiasm.

Ah, make me miss your brother so.